How to Change the Destiny of Your Child in three Minutes - Apostle Abeiku Okai

 As at age 10 I didn't know how to spell even 'tea' or recite the 'S-O - so'. My worse nightmare was my guardian summoning me before my colleagues and some elderly folks, asking me to recite the 'times table' (2-1-2). At Liberia Camp (Buduburam) I was thought to be an extremely dull child and always jeered at for being bad academically. In the neighborhood I was also called 'Jon', meaning a stupid kid. I was very quiet in class and was only seen drawing. 

But from Primary 3 at Senya Beraku Methodist School I started picking up. I remember my uncles boasting about me that I was clever and intelligent. My teacher, Mrs Joana Awotwe, also made my head to swell with joy that I was very intelligent. Once I was invited from my class to Primary 4 to mention a word on the board. The teacher, Madam Charity, gave me the cane and asked me to cane all my seniors because they couldn't mention that word. 

My pride was boosted by the praise and my shame was gone. In order to impress my cheer-givers that indeed I was intelligent I began giving greater attention to spelling and reading. I tried pronouncing every word my eye caught, whether in books or on sign boards. I opened every book to read. And the words I couldn't pronounce I would rush to Mrs Awotwe and asked her to help me pronounce it. I would always be the first to rush to the board to read for my colleagues to follow suit. Of course,  every kid likes to be praised and made to believe they are wonderful. To me this is what makes a child privileged or less privileged. That is to say kids who have parents or guardians who motivate them, no matter their poverty situation, are those enjoying the best privileges. And this is not to mean pamper and spoil the child. But rather let discipline go along with the lifting of the child's spirit. 

Allow your kids to grow at their own pace. Never consider any child as dull, stupid or unintelligent. At best give recognition to the unique strength of the child and praise his/ strength rather than hammering the weaknesses. Don't let other kids you see on social media doing exploit cause you to think your child is backward, not talented or never amounting to anything. Don't also ever compare your kids to other kids or even their siblings for any reason. 

Academic is good. Reading, writing, reciting, memorising and pronouncing words are wonderful for kids. But the fact that your child cannot do these things never mean he or she is not intelligent or serious. Give your child hope and stop seeing him/her as good for nothing, troublesome and stubborn. 

At best give ample time to the child and motivate the child to read, learn, practise, watch the right videos and partake of things that would help his/her development. The teacher and the classroom is not enough. Be also available for the child. 

Study your child carefully and discover his or her learning style, which I will be discussing in my next post. 

 I believe this is what your child needs from you, not demotivation and always pointing out errors and failures.

I have not yet attained my goals. But at least I am proud of where I have reached as the first from my family to graduate from the University, holding key leadership positions wherever I find myself, making positive impact on several young people, counseling couples and restoring marriage and above all teaching the word of God and raising ministers. The 'dullest' child, the 'stupid' boy, is now a joy to several souls. 

So let me leave you with what Albert Isaacson  wrote about Albert Einstein:

Einstein was slow in learning how to speak. His parents even consulted a doctor. He also had a cheeky rebelliousness toward authority, which led one headmaster to expel him and another to amuse history by saying that he would never amount to much. But these traits helped make him a genius. His cocky contempt for authority led him to question conventional wisdom. His slow verbal development made him curious about ordinary things — such as space and time — that most adults take for granted. His father gave him a compass at age five, and he puzzled over the nature of a magnetic field for the rest of his life. And he tended to think in pictures rather than words."

Thank you. 

Rt. Hon. Apostle Abeiku Okai

General Steward (Anathallo Chapel Int.)

Speaker (ASD Youth Parliament)

Conference Speaker and Marriage Counselor